The Loving Story, 2011
Dir.: Nancy Buirski
Prod.: Nancy Buirski, Elisabeth Halivand James
Exec Prod.: Sheila Nevins
In case you've been living under a rock for the past few weeks,
section three of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) was deemed "unconstitutional" at the end of June. What does that mean? It means that same-sex partners who were married in a state that recognizes same-sex marriage are now legally recognized as "spouses" and can now receive spousal benefits - like health care and insurance benefits - like everyone else in this goddamn country. It means that in the eyes of the government, same-sex and heterosexual marriages are one in the same.
DOMA was signed by President Clinton in 1996. It effectively barred same-sex couples who were married in states that recognized same-sex marriages from receiving spousal benefits. Let me repeat that: 1996. That was only seventeen years ago, people.
Now that DOMA has been overturned, we're going to have a good laugh about it, right? Oh boy, how silly was that? Can you believe how uppity people were over a thing like same-sex couples getting the same benefits as heterosexual couples? My goodness, are we are going to look back one day and have a good knee-slapper. How silly everyone was! How ridiculous people were acting! What was wrong with people back then? Our children are going to be appalled that same-sex couples didn't have the same rights as heterosexual couples. Why, it's almost as ridiculous as interracial marriage being illegal! Ha-ha-ha!
Guess what? In 1958 - a mere fifty-five years ago - interracial marriage was illegal. It was a crime that was punishable by jail time, and this was the case across 24 states.
That was also the year that Mildred and Richard Loving were arrested in Virginia shortly after their marriage for this very reason. Mildred is black, Richard is white, and they spent nine years trying to get their marriage recognized in their home state. Told through archival footage, interviews and home video, The Loving Story tells the incredible tale of a beautiful couple and their powerful love for one another that went all the way up to the Supreme Court.
At two AM, less than two months after they were married in Washington D.C., the police entered Richard and Mildred's home, ordered them out of bed and placed them under arrest. They were put in jail for a year, but their sentences were suspended under the condition that they leave the state.
Mildred admits that she didn't know that interracial marriage was illegal. She recalls the segregated South, not being allowed to eat in "white only" restaurants, but she'd always seen black people and white people together, and it didn't bother her or anyone she knew.
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Richard and Mildred share a tender moment in their home |
After they were released, Richard and Mildred were separated. Mildred went to her parents' house, Richard went to his parents'. Shortly after, they left Virginia and went to Washington, D.C., but they were under the impression that they could come back to Virginia and visit. They were wrong. Once they returned to the state, they were arrested once more.
In a filmed interview, Richard's mother Lola Loving is surprisingly nonplussed about the whole marriage, saying she's never seen them not happy when they were together. "I like 'em. I like her," she says. "I didn't advise them not to get married."
Peggy Loving, Richard and Mildred's daughter, recalls that her parents loved to go to drag races, and her father was passionate about building and fixing drag cars. Richard is described by friends as "warm, very friendly...he could blend and mix with any people." Other voices who'd known the Lovings describe the community they lived in as helpful and friendly. No one really cared about what race you were, and everyone helped everyone.
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The Lovings, shortly before their arrest |
So what had happened in this utopia that made it all go wrong for Mildred and Richard?
The local sheriff, that's what. It was well known that he did not get along well with the black community in Caroline County, VA, where the Lovings lived. He was the one who knocked down Richard and Mildred's door in the middle of the night to arrest them, and he was the one who kept trying to bring them back to jail.
Mildred was unhappy living in Washington D.C., and often went back to Virginia to visit her family. They were allowed to go there separately, but not together. "Knowing them, they probably came back together," Peggy Loving says. Mildred and Richard often had to sneak around when they wanted to come together. Their friends would help them lay low, and they would stay out of public places, mainly spending time with family and keeping close to family homes.
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Mildred and Richard on the porch of the boarding house owned by Mildred's sister Garnet |
In 1964, at the height of the Civil Rights movement, Mildred wrote a letter to Robert Kennedy - who was, at the time, the Attorney General of the United States - and told him her story, letting him know how unhappy she was at her plight of not being allowed back to her home state simply because she was married to a white man. He wrote back, suggesting that she contact the American Civil Liberties Union.
Meanwhile, in the South, we start to see a very aggressive tightening of segregation and a prominence of the KKK in the South. Race issues were becoming a bigger and bigger deal, with more prominence in the media. Coinciding was the Lovings' ongoing battle with the court systems, and the runaround they were given. It wasn't until 1965 that the court of the district of Virginia finally decided that the Lovings could go to the Supreme Court of Appeals. Unfortunately, their ruling was upheld and affirmed, that Richard and Mildred were criminals, guilt of interracial marriage, which is considered just as heinous as incestual marriage. Of course, they appealed this decision again to the US Supreme Court. Richard and Mildred were flabbergasted that this was going so far. They did not attend the proceedings in Washington, D.C. but a statement was read on Richard's behalf: "Just tell the court that I love my wife."
Then, in June 1967, the US Supreme Court unanimously deemed that interracial marriage was considered 100% legal in every state. Those states that had laws against interracial marriage must revoke them immediately. The ruling read as follows:
Under our Constitution, the freedom to marry, or not marry, a person of another race resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the state. These convictions must be revered. It is so ordered.
And just like that, Mildred and Richard were "free".
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The Lovings at a press conference following the Supreme Court ruling |
After nine years, they were finally able to move back to Virginia with their children, and not have to worry about being arrested. They could go out in their hometown, hold hands, visit family and friends, without wondering who was going to break down the door and drag them away. Just like that.
I thought that among the celebrating of DOMA being overturned, we should take a moment to thank the Lovings and honor their bravery, determination and devotion to their cause and one another. Because I feel in a way, Robert and Mildred Loving's fight to their right to marry paved the way for not only other interracial couples, but for same-sex couples as well.
Our country is moving at a slow pace, "the wheels of justice grind slowly", but we know from the case of the Lovings that, one day, we will see equal rights for all. So while DOMA coming off the table is a step in the right direction, it does not mean the fight is over. Someday soon, we can hope to see that this:
will one day be as legal as this
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In Loving Memory of Richard (1933-1975) and Mildred (1939-2008) |